Why performance goals might keep you going when aesthetic ones can’t

This time of year is unique in its many and layered levels of guilt. Especially if you've decided it's time to sort out your neglected fitness.

Everywhere you look, there's someone in their pants doing 'before' photos. Maybe even with smug 'after' photos if they've been at it for a full year. Bigger bodies. Smaller bodies. Loud and proud bodies. Bodies on bodies on bodies.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to change how you look.  A lot of FitBtch members say in their onboarding survey that 'losing weight' is their primary goal and that FINE. But beyond a doubt, training purely for what the mirror shows is often a dodgy foundation. Because that mirror is a bloody liar. And (visual) progress can be painfully slow. Plus, there's the issue that motivation based only on appearance tends to wobble the moment life gets busy. "I've got by this long, it can wait." Again.

So today we're asking you slags – what if your goal wasn’t purely aesthetics, but about what your body can do?

Setting performance goals give you something tangible. They are concrete and measurable. You either did the thing or you didn't. Yet. They create momentum and a sense of capability that quietly spills into everything else in your life. You feel stronger, like you’re progressing. That has a truly magical effect on your motivation and confidence.

So here are some of Kelly's suggestions for performance-based goals that often keep midlife women – like FitBtch members – far more motivated than chasing the flat stomach you left in your 20s.

⁠Go up a weight (and actually use it)

Most women tend to sit just below the weight they could be lifting. Maybe 2 entire kg below, in fact. Not because they can’t hack the entire session with it, but because they lack the confidence to try.

Set yourself this goal in 2026: buy bigger weights, use them consistently and let your body adapt. We promise you'll notice the difference. This isn’t about testing your limits to the max. You won't look like Arnold Schwarzenegger with a couple of extra kg in each hand. It’s about trusting yourself to progress.

Get to grips with push-ups

One of our most recent FitBtch members referred to herself as a 'pathetic weakling' when it came to pushups, a pretty common sentiment among women, tbf. You're not, btw. But push-ups are a classic confidence builder - when you go from being unable to do a single, solitary one, to bashing out 5, 10, more - that's an absolute fking rush.

A realistic progression is

• Knee push-ups → incline push-ups

• Incline → full push-up

• One full push-up → three → five

It all counts. Each step is proof that your strength is improving, even if the mirror is still displaying... not a lot of difference.

Finish the cardio workout without stopping

A genuinely underrated goal is simply to complete the workout (or the run) without pausing. We're not looking for faster. Or harder work, really. Just… continuous effort that's sustainable.

Don’t stop the video or bail early. Not unless you're winded from laughing at our ridiculous banter obv. But building cardiovascular fitness needs a bit of discomfort. Noticing your breathing improves week by week is such a tonic. It’s incredibly motivating. So plough through and collapse in a heap, but feel free to call us utter c*nts at the end.

Hold things for longer

Time under tension builds muscle strength. Adding a few seconds here and there is doable and is absolutely not going to do you in (much). Think holding lunges a wee bit longer without rushing to stand back up, a knee plank for 10 seconds longer than last week. Heck, a full plank for a few seconds or simply set the goal of getting to the point when you're feeling stable rather than shaky. Holding your body weight with control is a very powerful reminder of what your body is capable of.

⁠Build towards something you actually enjoy

Not every goal has to involve getting your minge on a mat of course. For us, strength training is non-negotiable, but we know many of you slagbags out there have other forms of exercise you greatly prefer, but perhaps you've let slide and lack the confidence to get back into? So maybe set your goal to build back up to running, if that gives you those exercise endorphins? Heads up that we have a Walking Challenge kicking off in February that would be the perfect precursor to starting running. Get your steps up, work those leg muscles and start to build up a bit of cardio fitness before pounding the pavements? Stay tuned for more on this.

Or maybe you bloody love swimming but haven't had the confidence to metaphorically dive in? We absolutely promise that no one is looking at you or cares how you look in your togs.

Enjoyment is absolutely a performance metric too, one that has been repeatedly shown to massively improve consistency.

Why this matters (especially at this time of year)

Aesthetic goals can feel a really long way off when you're just starting out (or back). But setting modest performance goals can give you quick wins along the way, and that is absolutely crucial for staying committed.

They remind you that you are getting stronger, you are more capable than you think and, importantly, progress isn’t just visual. And when motivation dips, which, sorry to say it probably will, confidence often carries you through.

You don’t have to choose one or the other though! Of course you can care about how you look. But if it take a while to see physical changes, appreciating what your body can do is so powerful.

So fk that lying mirror off in 2026 and try setting performance goals instead. Because strong feels good, and real progress feels incredible. Those feelings tend to stick around and help with everything else you want to achieve this year.

Read this far and not a member? You've got one more day to join us in our January Sale - the code is KICKSTART.